You can probably guess from the title of this post that I've been filling out a bunch of forms lately. I have, but I've also come up with a list of ways that (You*) have screwed up what might've been the start of a relationship. Here's where it began...
(You) were unclear - OK, If (you) want to date me, see me socially, get to see me naked, etc, that's great! But if all (you) want to be is my friend, please be clear about this, don't ask me to go hang out together at a place I was going to go anyway.
(You) were too casual - I like guys who are cool and a little bit smooth, but by staring off in another direction all night, barely speaking to me, and not asking how I'm doing or if I'm having a good time at all, (you) gave me the impression that (you) wished I wasn't around.
(You) were over there - When I got to the bar, (you) saw me walk in, find a seat, and order a drink... and (you) didn't come over, or even wave.
(You) were unreachable - I was running late, but (you) didn't give me any way to get that message to (you), and when I asked, (you) were late too - I'm guessing that scheduling issues are going to continue to occur.
(You) went in for the hug anyway - All of this didn't really work for me, really, it didn't. By the end of the night, I was really just trying to exit gracefully. But when (you) went in for the hug anyway, did (you) notice that I gave the "One arm, body turned away, foot pointed in the opposite direction, face nowhere close to yours" type? I hope that (you) did... because that's the hug I give to guys who are mostly likely only going to be a friend.
...(You*) has had his named changed to protect the 2 or 3 guys who I've recently had almost dates with... too bad guys, there's no spark, no replay.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Friday, August 10, 2007
Congrats!
To Stephanie: I am so proud of you, graduating & getting your Massage Therapy Certification today, you rock!
To Daryle: Chief... wow... That's a huge accomplishment, you've been working towards it for so long and now it's finally yours, you the man now, dog!
To everyone else who's done something really cool, or been awarded a prize that I don't know about, good on ya, way to go!
Now, if only I could find that goal sheet... it's around here somewhere....
To Daryle: Chief... wow... That's a huge accomplishment, you've been working towards it for so long and now it's finally yours, you the man now, dog!
To everyone else who's done something really cool, or been awarded a prize that I don't know about, good on ya, way to go!
Now, if only I could find that goal sheet... it's around here somewhere....
Monday, August 06, 2007
Half-Awake
I am half-awake, have somewhere to be in about an hour, and am vaguely angry about it. Please, for the love of all things holy, should you ever have the misfortune of waking up in my vicinity, do not talk to me until AFTER I've been awake for at least half an hour. If it's you that has to wake me up, it's probably a good idea to not take anything I say seriously during that time.
Sunday, August 05, 2007
From downriver up to the northeast and back again...
So I'm still awake after sleeping late to recover from an almost-brawl, grinning from ear to ear about the weekend, and wondering what's coming next.
Can't wait for Monday, it's a fresh new week!
Here's an old survey, can't remember who it's from:
1. What highway do you drive on the MOST?
Considering I live / work all around, I can't narrow it down to less than 5:
696 / Southfield / 75 / 96 / The Dave
2. When was the last time you bought a bathing suit?
couple years ago
3. Would you consider yourself a flirt?
I'm not a flirt, I'm a tease
4. What color is your boss's hair?
red, i'm my own boss
5. What are your siblings’ middle names?
Marie
6. What’s a song that puts you in the mood to dance/party?
Tubthumper by Chumbawamba
7. Where are you going on your next vacation?
no idea
8. Do you get paid weekly or bi-weekly?
neither
9. What color are your pillows?
white
10. What hours do you work?
depends on what i'm doing
11. Are you superstitious?
Nope
12. Whose motorcycle were you last on?
Glen's
13. Do you have any friends who have an STD?
unfortunately, yes
14. If the one person your mom despised but you liked died tomorrow, would you attend their wake and funeral?
Yes
15. You have $20 to buy the perfect shirt to wear tonight, where do you go?
i go pick up Sherri & make her go with me to watch me try on a million shirts, then go back to the first store we went to & buy the first one I saw
16. You come home after a night of drinking, what do you hope is there to eat?
cold pizza
17. How many calendars are in your house?
2 electronic, 2 paper
18. Have you ever been confused over two relationships at once?
nope
19. Who is the last person that made you laugh in person?
Dale
20. Over the phone/internet?
Charlotte
21. Name one of your ex's mother's names?
Theresa
22. Do you miss high school?
nope
23. How many pairs of sneakers do you own?
4 or 5
24. What kind of lotion is closest to you?
several kinds, i'm close to my work stuff
25. Whats on TV this second?
it's off... that's weird....
26. What helps you sleep?
inner peace
27. Are you thinner than your best friend?
don't think so, but, it's possible
28. How much would you get if you traded your car in?
can't, it's a lease, my sister would KILL me
29. Last time you saw your dad?
Alive? it's been a while...
30. You're on the phone having a really boring conversation... How do you end it?
i gotta go, something's on fire
31. Last time you babysat?
can't recall
32. Next dentist/gyno/doctor appt?
none planned right now
33. How often do you do laundry?
a load a day
34. What commercials are your favorite?
funny ones
35. Have you ever been on prescribed narcotics?
yes
36. Dumbest movie you have ever seen?
too many to name just one
37. What's hummus made of?
chick peas, lemon juice, garlic... couple other things depending on the recipe
38. When’s the last time you used a slip and slide?
what do you mean by that?
39. Favorite girls/boys names?
dunno
40. What’s annoying you right now?
nothing really
41. What did you eat for dinner tonight?
steak, hummus, pita bread, mt. dew
42. Do you have a crush on someone from the workplace?
nope
43. Are you an introvert or extrovert?
I think I'm another kind of -vert
44. When's your grandma's birthday?
no idea, but i'm pretty sure she's not celebrating it this year
45. Who can you depend on to post the best surveys?
Jo-Jo, Wooley, 86
46. How many rings do you wear daily?
none
47. Any tattoos?
3 on my back, getting another one soonish
48. Any piercing?
ears twice each
48. Name 3 people you worked with today?
phone calls with Charlotte
49. Favorite summer cocktail?
vodka / tonic / lime
50. How much gas is in your tank?
about 1/4
51. Last book you bought?
The Prophet, $2 at a garage sale
52. Plans for today/tonight?
seminar thing all day, packing & moving, getting a good night's sleep
Can't wait for Monday, it's a fresh new week!
Here's an old survey, can't remember who it's from:
1. What highway do you drive on the MOST?
Considering I live / work all around, I can't narrow it down to less than 5:
696 / Southfield / 75 / 96 / The Dave
2. When was the last time you bought a bathing suit?
couple years ago
3. Would you consider yourself a flirt?
I'm not a flirt, I'm a tease
4. What color is your boss's hair?
red, i'm my own boss
5. What are your siblings’ middle names?
Marie
6. What’s a song that puts you in the mood to dance/party?
Tubthumper by Chumbawamba
7. Where are you going on your next vacation?
no idea
8. Do you get paid weekly or bi-weekly?
neither
9. What color are your pillows?
white
10. What hours do you work?
depends on what i'm doing
11. Are you superstitious?
Nope
12. Whose motorcycle were you last on?
Glen's
13. Do you have any friends who have an STD?
unfortunately, yes
14. If the one person your mom despised but you liked died tomorrow, would you attend their wake and funeral?
Yes
15. You have $20 to buy the perfect shirt to wear tonight, where do you go?
i go pick up Sherri & make her go with me to watch me try on a million shirts, then go back to the first store we went to & buy the first one I saw
16. You come home after a night of drinking, what do you hope is there to eat?
cold pizza
17. How many calendars are in your house?
2 electronic, 2 paper
18. Have you ever been confused over two relationships at once?
nope
19. Who is the last person that made you laugh in person?
Dale
20. Over the phone/internet?
Charlotte
21. Name one of your ex's mother's names?
Theresa
22. Do you miss high school?
nope
23. How many pairs of sneakers do you own?
4 or 5
24. What kind of lotion is closest to you?
several kinds, i'm close to my work stuff
25. Whats on TV this second?
it's off... that's weird....
26. What helps you sleep?
inner peace
27. Are you thinner than your best friend?
don't think so, but, it's possible
28. How much would you get if you traded your car in?
can't, it's a lease, my sister would KILL me
29. Last time you saw your dad?
Alive? it's been a while...
30. You're on the phone having a really boring conversation... How do you end it?
i gotta go, something's on fire
31. Last time you babysat?
can't recall
32. Next dentist/gyno/doctor appt?
none planned right now
33. How often do you do laundry?
a load a day
34. What commercials are your favorite?
funny ones
35. Have you ever been on prescribed narcotics?
yes
36. Dumbest movie you have ever seen?
too many to name just one
37. What's hummus made of?
chick peas, lemon juice, garlic... couple other things depending on the recipe
38. When’s the last time you used a slip and slide?
what do you mean by that?
39. Favorite girls/boys names?
dunno
40. What’s annoying you right now?
nothing really
41. What did you eat for dinner tonight?
steak, hummus, pita bread, mt. dew
42. Do you have a crush on someone from the workplace?
nope
43. Are you an introvert or extrovert?
I think I'm another kind of -vert
44. When's your grandma's birthday?
no idea, but i'm pretty sure she's not celebrating it this year
45. Who can you depend on to post the best surveys?
Jo-Jo, Wooley, 86
46. How many rings do you wear daily?
none
47. Any tattoos?
3 on my back, getting another one soonish
48. Any piercing?
ears twice each
48. Name 3 people you worked with today?
phone calls with Charlotte
49. Favorite summer cocktail?
vodka / tonic / lime
50. How much gas is in your tank?
about 1/4
51. Last book you bought?
The Prophet, $2 at a garage sale
52. Plans for today/tonight?
seminar thing all day, packing & moving, getting a good night's sleep
Friday, August 03, 2007
Dumb Joke and 2 Other Weird Events
Where do compulusive masturbators keep their money?
The Spank Bank!
Weird Event #1:
- I went to get groceries at the Kroger that used to be a Farmer Jack on Warren & Middlebelt today, and all was well... until I went to the checkout lanes. First, they've eliminated the "Candy Free" lane that I love because instead of candy, there are 46,328 other impuluse items, and some of the stuff is really cool to look at, bummer. Second, there were employees standing at the entrances to the lanes looking like Buckingham Palace Guards. I didn't quite know exactly what it was they were there to watch over, so I figured maybe these were stock people caught shoplifting and were being put on time-out by a manager or something. I - was - wrong. As I entered the lane to put my groceries on the conveyor, one of them grabbed the side of my cart, guided in it, and began putting my stuff up there for me... UM, NO!!Especially since it was a squirrely looking little guy, and I was buying tampons... sheesh. I let the checker know that it was weird in a bad way, she laughed at me a little and said she'd let the manager know.
Weird Event #2:
-Actually happened last night, but I was too tired to write about it then. I'm sure you've seen signs at corners that people put up advertising lost dogs, garage sales, etc. Well, as I sat at the light on Beech Daly between I-96 and the post office, I watched a lady as she struggled to mash her sign into the ground at the corner by the utility pole. What she failed to notice, while smoking a cigarette and jabbing the metal stake over and over into the earth was the ORANGE GAS LINE DO NOT DIG Flag directly in line with the hole she was trying to make. When the light turned green, I got out of there, shaking my head all the way... as much as I wanted to take a picture of the stupid lady blowing herself to kingdom come, I didn't want to be that close when it happened.
The Spank Bank!
Weird Event #1:
- I went to get groceries at the Kroger that used to be a Farmer Jack on Warren & Middlebelt today, and all was well... until I went to the checkout lanes. First, they've eliminated the "Candy Free" lane that I love because instead of candy, there are 46,328 other impuluse items, and some of the stuff is really cool to look at, bummer. Second, there were employees standing at the entrances to the lanes looking like Buckingham Palace Guards. I didn't quite know exactly what it was they were there to watch over, so I figured maybe these were stock people caught shoplifting and were being put on time-out by a manager or something. I - was - wrong. As I entered the lane to put my groceries on the conveyor, one of them grabbed the side of my cart, guided in it, and began putting my stuff up there for me... UM, NO!!Especially since it was a squirrely looking little guy, and I was buying tampons... sheesh. I let the checker know that it was weird in a bad way, she laughed at me a little and said she'd let the manager know.
Weird Event #2:
-Actually happened last night, but I was too tired to write about it then. I'm sure you've seen signs at corners that people put up advertising lost dogs, garage sales, etc. Well, as I sat at the light on Beech Daly between I-96 and the post office, I watched a lady as she struggled to mash her sign into the ground at the corner by the utility pole. What she failed to notice, while smoking a cigarette and jabbing the metal stake over and over into the earth was the ORANGE GAS LINE DO NOT DIG Flag directly in line with the hole she was trying to make. When the light turned green, I got out of there, shaking my head all the way... as much as I wanted to take a picture of the stupid lady blowing herself to kingdom come, I didn't want to be that close when it happened.
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Why I like stupid movies...
Movies are entertainment: Say it with me - EN-TER-TAIN-MENT... you do not always have to walk away from a movie with a profound sense of enlightenment, weeping for man's inhumanity to man, or touched beyond reason by the abiding love of the main characters... sometimes, it's OK to just enjoy the show! Right now, I'm watching a pretty stupid movie that I've seen a hundred times before, but it's fun to sit back and take in the awful lines and bad costumes. Movies are a great escape: Even a really bad movie might have amazing scenery, a cool soundtrack, or you might see a future star in an early appearance onscreen (Matt Damon in Mystic Pizza, anyone?).
Obscure references in movies can unite groups of people. For instance, the Pharmeceutically-Enhanced Goddess has an away message set to a line from her favorite movie, and people correct her, telling her the word is supposed to be "ruckus"... but they've completely mistaken the line, and the movie itself. She's proud of loving films that very few people have seen, and shares her favorites with close friends. I'm going back to watching my movie now, have a good night.
Obscure references in movies can unite groups of people. For instance, the Pharmeceutically-Enhanced Goddess has an away message set to a line from her favorite movie, and people correct her, telling her the word is supposed to be "ruckus"... but they've completely mistaken the line, and the movie itself. She's proud of loving films that very few people have seen, and shares her favorites with close friends. I'm going back to watching my movie now, have a good night.
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